Last Wednesday....



(I am the one in green. Who is not a boy.)

Work is good but I hate 6 o' clock mornings. It's funny. I've been sleeping so terribly since I've come home. I keep waking up in the middle of the night and then despairing because I only have another 2 hours more to sleep or something.

I think I nearly passed out today though. It was weird, I was photocopying things and then all of a sudden I couldn't breathe and my vision started going fuzzy. I have no idea why, but it felt like last summer when the same thing happened, except then I think it was because of the heat and me being somewhat dehydrated and now it just doesn't make any sense. But anyway.

Not sleeping properly gives me a perpetual headache. It's icky.

Recommend me a book.

Aaaaaaaaagh I am so sick of studying. Exams suck, the end.

Train tracks at night are fun, especially when there are trains coming at you from behind, and even more especially when you are singing Disney tracks at the top of your lungs while you are walking down them. So is dancing all night, and waterfights, and pictures that look like what they aren't, and watching a group of rather large boys rock it out to 'Larger Than Life'.

And all that's left really is exams.

I think there's some people I'm really not being fair to lately, and I think it's because I've hit that dip I always do, but that's another story.

The last time I was this sick during an odd season it was the middle of summer and I was wandering the office building scene, spending my lunch money on Sobes and lemon honey cough drops instead of real food. Sore throats when it's sweltering hot outside is an odd feeling. This time it's not as warm but it still feels funny, and none of the places on campus seem to supply the flavour of Halls I like.

Yesterday I was eating with Emily and it was after lunch but before dinner sometime in the afternoon before our German class. The place was pretty much empty other than us and these three girls that looked maybe 14 and were dressed like hobos. It was so strange. One of them looked slightly more normal than the others, but they were all wearing like flannel plaid shirts and pyjama pants and hippy skirts and those hats that come down to cover your ears and carrying huge bags from Value Village and some other place. They split a bowl of soup and a plate of noodles and at one point the girl who looked oldest ran out in a pani because she'd forgotten her wallet somewhere. And later when I caught snippets of her conversation she was one who was explaining some things Harry Potter to the others. The way she was talking it sounded like she was showing them drawings or something - "And this is Hermione and Ron and Vivian" - only there isn't such a character as Vivian and I couldn't make out if there was actually something in her hands. It was perplexing.

I'm in such a strange mood all the time nowadays and I don't understand.

So after a weekend of the good kind of doing nothing in Waterloo this morning I slept through my first two classes, because clearly I am just that good. And visiting friends means you really don't get that much sleep and there are some people I can talk to for days and days without ever getting bored or repeating conversations. And the same people you never have to say much for them to know what you mean. Of course, in Waterloo on a non-planned-event night there isn't really much to do other than talk and hang around, but hey, it's what we choose to do everywhere else anyway even when there are things to do. I am definitely glad I don't do the meal plan thing though, because I would get sick of caf food so so fast.

And since German presentations don't write themselves, although they should.

This weekend I kept having panic attacks in my sleep and waking up hyperventilating and certain I was drowning, but that's only when I was sleeping. When I was awake mostly I did nothing despite all the things I should have been doing and it was nice.

Today I gave my hair to cancer and now it's really ridiculously short. I'd show you a picture but I don't have any on me.

I have a math test on Wednesday. Ew.

Yeah, so my mother needs to get the stick out of her ass and stop becoming randomly enraged by small things because she always decides to take it out by throwing hissy fits and trying to pick fights with me. I'm not really sure what causes her more annoyance, me ignoring all her ranting or me ranting back. Because I'm pretty sure I'm better than her at the latter. I kinda wish they'd hit me or something already so I'd have an excuse to be disowned, and by disowned, I mean so that I can leave in peace.

The Lord of the Rings musical is ridiculous. Although the staging is quite awesome. I definitely wouldn't see it again but the only reason I went this time was because it was free, so.

Yay cake and stupid magazines.

My apartment is so cold.

Being home sucks.